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Revamp.

I’ve been meaning to share more of my senior year so that I could relive my last’s of moments. Whether it be a foodie review of yet another Oakland restaurant or an excerpt from my statement of purpose from one of my graduate school applications, I want to see and feel it all over again one day. I also want to acknowledge the people I may not see ever again, here, so I can be reminded of the impact of interpersonal relationships.

I think I would begin by investing in a reliable, mediocrely fancy camera.

I also go back and forth between just making the move over to Wordpress but who says I can’t look back at alllll my growth in my good ol’ Tumblr? It’s been through my worst, and I love it too much to ever let it go! 

Here’s to a cleaner, more consistently happy, highlighting of my good life :)

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08:29 pm: sitonapumpkin

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What I’ve learned and Why I’m thankful.

If you want a meaningful relationship, know that you have to grow up. Because no one is going to do it for you. I admit that I struggle a lot with independence, and it’s something that people overlook because they mistaken it for my go-getter attitude. No, competing for an internship is easier for me than believing I deserve it. Next, I have a mild case of princess syndrome. Call it middle child/only daughter theory, but I am constantly grateful for my knights in shining armor: bffs, parents, big guys, my boyfriend..sure, I will openly ask for help, but I give people all the credit when they help me out of a sticky situation well, because I let myself think I would completely drown without my rock(s). I think my biggest obstacle preventing me from growing up is my attachment to so many things because I easily, whole-heartedly, invest in everything I love. And letting go is more painful than moving forward, always, because I’m the worst at goodbyes, forgetting that I’m generally the first one to say hello’s.

But, I am learning. As time goes by, I am letting myself trust in time. And space. And solitude. I am finally letting myself love who I am with sincerity and sensibility. I’m still hoping to see the girl Justin loves when I look at my reflection. And I will no longer hold back on my ambitions. I want to be free of remorse, regret, rage..and I want to live reflective of this moment inside.

06:30 pm: sitonapumpkin4 notes

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Embarking the routine while observing Life at its fullest.

01:28 am: sitonapumpkin1 note

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No-sleep-November

I keep thinking about our simple but special triple date the other night, Justin and I, Mark and Roschelle, Joshua and Gabi. And I’m overwhelmed with pride to be in the casual company of great people. The latter four have a tight bond yet the six of us relate subconsciously through our own relationships that are full of meaning and strength. Seeing and being around Love makes me feel less alone next to Justin, whom, makes it harder each and every day to truly describe how it feels to fall in love again and again.

Apps on apps on apps, lately. My heart goes out to every senior who’s spiteful of their professors because homework should be the least of our worries right now! But, what I did not expect was how fun it is to apply for schools this time around. I’m no longer consumed with shame over mediocre grades, well, because I grew up and saw how miniscule those letters define me. I’m allowing myself to value every moment of this exciting, perplexing process because I’ve gotten this far.

And I haven’t sacrificed my happiness for much lately either. Something I just realized. That’s how I know I have been in the best hands, and I am only getting better on my own.

And I miss you, Gabi..always will, because our friendship revolves around a never-ready goodbye, good to see you, and until next time <3

Love and loving.

12:28 am: sitonapumpkin2 notes

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Almost everyday there’s a moment where I catch myself daydreaming about running away with Justin and being happy forever. How fortunate we are to have such loving families and friends (and students) we will never leave behind.

12:40 am: sitonapumpkin

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This Man Just Got Divorced. Then He Wrote This Epic Marriage Advice. A Must Read.

1) Never stop courting. Never stop dating. NEVER EVER take that woman for granted. When you asked her to marry you, you promised to be that man that would OWN HER HEART and to fiercely protect it. This is the most important and sacred treasure you will ever be entrusted with. SHE CHOSE YOU. Never forget that, and NEVER GET LAZY in your love.

05:01 pm: sitonapumpkin

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The love for what I do is a blessing

And a curse. I have never felt more abandoned in my life.

01:44 am: sitonapumpkin

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you make it impossible for me to feel more loved by anyone else.

12:23 am: sitonapumpkin1 note

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Chillin with no makeup on

After I tried on clothes and came out unsatisfied with my current appearance, my love kisses me continuously on the cheek and says, “This is the most beautiful I’ve seen you in our 4 years of friendship.”

09:59 pm: sitonapumpkin5 notes

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nope. still cannot stand you. once I feel strongly about someone it’s hard to let go of my intuition.

07:31 pm: sitonapumpkin